The Revenge
by Dr.Indigo
Summary: Sequel to The Second Date. After suffering yet another public humiliation, Lord Hater has become more desperate than ever to prove that he's still #1. To that end, he has sent a scathing email to Lord Dominator challenging her to deadly combat. But with his armada disbanded and his own troops still in sick bay, can he survive such an encounter? Probably not.
1. Prologue

Hello everyone, and welcome to the next installment of my Wander/Dominator series. I know I said I was gonna wait until May, but an idea for a prologue just popped into my head yesterday and I just had to write it down. Anyway, just to give you a sense of perspective, this story takes place about two and a half weeks after the events of The Second Date. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Blah, Blah, Blah, Enjoy.

The Revenge: Prologue.

Time: 09:00 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Unknown.

In a large, dimly lit room hidden somewhere within his secret sanctum, the Night Mayor sat at his desk; sipping a blend of Terachnoid Dark Roast and Galapagan O+ from his favorite coffee mug. The mixture had sort of a bitter aftertaste, but it was still the best way he knew how to start his day.

After taking one last long sip, the dandy bat finally set his mug down and directed his full attention on the mechanical man sitting before him.

"Alright Doctor," he said as he leaned back into his reclining desk chair. "I'm all set."

"Really? Are you sure about that?" the scarred automaton asked sarcastically. "I mean; wouldn't you rather waste another half-hour nursing that disgusting swill?"

"Don't get smart with me, Boy." The Night Mayor replied in a calm yet threatening tone. "I might need that electronic brain of yours, but the rest of you is disposable. Savvy?"

"Yeah… I savvy." The mechanical man answered nervously, before switching back to his standard demeanor. "So, where do you want to begin?"

"As it is written in the sacred texts of the Szlarnian Homeword, 'Always begin with the beginning, and when you get to the end, stop'."

"Uh… What?"

"Just give me an update on the Grand Plague, ya igit."

"Alright, alright, no need to get snippy." Replied the robot-man as he activated his own chair's holo-screen. "According to the latest readouts, we're still on schedule. We should have the requisite eight hundred billion progenies in less than two hundred days."

"Excellent."

"Although, we could be done a lot sooner if you'd just let me…"

"No!" the man-bat answered emphatically; slamming his fist against his desk for further emphasis. "I will not let you jeopardize this operation with one of your crack-brained shortcuts!"

"But, Your Honor, I…"

"Do you want to rule this galaxy?"

"Of course, but I…"

"Then I suggest you shut up and do what I say."

"But Sir I… I understand. No shortcuts."

"Good." The Night Mayor said sternly, before slipping back into his gentleman demeanor. "Now then, what of the portals?"

The Doctor pressed a few buttons on his holo-screen and the display changed to something else.

"Let's see… the gateways on Bingleborp, Baaaaa-halla, Frivolly, and Poosh are already operational. And the ones on Destructopia, Clunk, and Helaphax will be up and running within the next few days."

"I see… and how many more planets do we need?"

"About three should be enough."

"No foolin'?" the man-bat asked, sounding almost hopeful.

"No really, just three more planets and then you're done."

"My lord," the Night Mayor muttered in awe. "It's really happenin'. I'm in the homestretch. Just a few more months and I can finally leave this stinkin' galaxy forever."

"Yes, but only after you've helped me conquer it."

"Only after you've finished my Grand Plague. So you'd best not screw anythin' up."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." The metal-man grumbled indignantly before resuming his previous demeanor. "Which reminds me, there's been another shift in the balance of power."

"What do ya mean?"

"The Hater Alliance has been disbanded."

"Already?" the Night Mayor asked disbelievingly. "It ain't even been a month since they formed the dang thing. What the heck happened?"

"I believe this should answer all your questions." The Doctor said as he turned his holo-screen around so his partner could see.

There on the display was a scan of the morning newspaper.

The headline read as follows.

 **Lord Hater: #1 Idiot.**

End Notes:

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, because the Night Mayor and his accomplice won't be seen again until the epilogue. Yeah, this was just a fun bonus thing I wanted to do to give you all a little insight into the goals and motives of the series' main villains. You know, since you all like them so much. Anyway, the rest of the story will focus heavily on Hater, Peepers, Dominator, and maybe Wander if we have time. I'm gonna try to finish one more chapter of my Adventure Time anthology before I completely throw myself into this one, but that shouldn't take too long. Until then, Peace.


	2. Chapter 1

Hello everybody, and welcome to the first official chapter of The Revenge, the third installment of my Death Star series; that's the shipping name for Wander/Dominator in case you didn't know. Not much else to say, so let's just get right into it. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 1.

Time: 13:00 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Lord Hater's Skull Ship.

Deep within the semi-fortified nerve center of what up until yesterday had been the Hater Alliance, Lord Hater's loyal Second in Command and Strategist Supreme of the 'Indomitable' Watchdog Army, Commander Peepers, was conducting a top secret meeting with a select group of his most competent operatives.

The purpose of this meeting?

To insure their own survival.

"Men, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. Yesterday was a total fiasco." Said the Supreme Watchdog as he paced in front of the small assembly he had gathered. "It was humbling, humiliating, and without a doubt our most crippling setback to date."

"All the other villains laughed at us." Said one of the other Watchdogs glumly.

"Yeah, and a really mean old lady pulled my pants down." Added another.

"Yes Pat, I know. I was there." Replied Peepers, sounding mildly irritated by the interruption. "But as bad as yesterday was, today could be even worse. Which is why we need to do some damage control fast."

As if responding to his mental commands, a slide projector suddenly turned on; displaying what appeared to be a series of overly complicated diagrams for something called 'Operation Blackout'.

"Now then," Peepers said as he began his practiced pitch. "I've chosen the six of you for this mission because of your expertise in covert ops, as well as your years of tireless dedication to Lord Hater."

"But, I just started on Monday." Interrupted the Watchdog on the far left.

"And I work in the mailroom." Added another on the far right.

"Okay! I chose the six of you because you were the best I could come up with on short notice! It doesn't matter!" Peepers shouted before taking a quick cleansing breath and resuming his professional demeanor. "All that matters is that Lord Hater is still reeling from yesterday's… _incident_. His pride's been wounded, he's feeling very vulnerable right now, and as we all know, whenever Lord Hater feels vulnerable he makes _incredibly_ bad decisions. Decisions that often end badly for the rest of us."  
Several of the senior Watchdogs shuttered as the memories came flooding back.

"Exactly. Which is why if we want to stay alive we have to keep Lord Hater calm and relaxed for at least the next seventy-two hours. After that things should return to normal." The Supreme Watchdog explained to his underlings. "Now, the last time I checked on him, Lord Hater was still sulking in his room, and he seemed hell-bent on staying there all day. But we can't count on that, so we have to act now."

Pulling out his trusty pointing stick, Peepers directed everyone's attention toward the first set of diagrams.

"Phase 1: Pat, Oswald, Ramirez, I need each of you to put together a small strike force and destroy every newsstand within a twenty parsec radius. Can you guys handle that?"

"Sir yes Sir!" the three Watchdogs answered in unison.

"Excellent. Now then, on to Phase 2. Steve, Charlie, I need you guys to go out and start confiscating everyone's cellphones. Then I want you to stash them all in the downstairs pantry until the seventy-two hours are up. Is that clear?"

"Sir yes Sir!" replied the two Watchdogs in question.

"Good. Now since we can't disable the ship's Wi-Fi without causing all sorts of problems, Andy, I'm gonna need you to follow Lord Hater and make sure he doesn't try to use the internet. We'll call that Phase 3."

"You got it Boss." Replied Andy enthusiastically. "Hey, maybe while I'm at it, I'll ask Lord Hater if he wants to be on my show. Cuz I think an interview with him would really make my ratings pop."

"Andy, I swear to Grop, if you bother Lord Hater with that stupid show of yours I will throw you out the nearest airlock!"

"Understood."

"Alright men, you have your assignments." The Supreme Watchdog said as he prepared to bring his presentation to a close. "Now get out there and… Charlie! What the **heck** do you think you're **doing**!"

Suddenly, all eyes were on the Watchdog in the very back; who had somehow managed to get his hands on a potentially devastating piece of contraband.

"What?" asked Charlie innocently. "It's just a newspaper."

"Just a newspaper!" Peepers parroted as he got up in his underling's retinas at an almost impossible speed. " _Just_ a _newspaper_!"

"Whoa man, just chillax." Charlie said defensively. "The paperboy delivered it this morning, just like he always does. I just snatched it up first so I could do the Sudoku. No biggie."

"Yes biggie! Very, very big biggie, Charlie!" the Supreme Watchdog yelled, his voice cracking from the exertion. "If Lord Hater sees this paper he's gonna lose it! Haven't you been paying attention?"

"Not really." Charlie confessed casually. "I was kinda invested in this Sudoku."

" _ **WILL YOU FORGET ABOUT THE STUPID SUDOKU!**_ " Peepers screamed at the top of his voice; snatching the loathsome paper from his subordinate's hands.

Feeling like he was about to pop a blood vessel, the Supreme Watchdog paused for a moment to let out a few more cleansing breaths. After about a minute or two if this, he finally calmed down enough to continue.

"Look… I'm sorry for coming down so hard on you guys. But I just need you all to understand how serious this is." He said, now sounding much, much calmer. "Lord Hater's in a really bad place right now, and anything could set him off. So we need to be extra careful over the next few days so as not to…."

"PEEPERS!"

Suddenly the air was shattered by the unmistakably whiney bellow of their lord and master; causing the Watchdog Supreme to devolve into a full-blown panic.

"Oh my Grop!" he shouted as he began to hyperventilate. "Lord Hater's coming! People this not a drill! Repeat, this is not a drill! Battle stations everybody! Go! Go! Go!"

Like the good little soldiers there are, the other Watchdogs rushed out of the conference room as quick as lightning. Leaving their fearless leader to deal whatever madness was about to befall him.

"PEEPERS!" the whining voice bellowed again, this time sounding much closer. "COME ON PEEPERS! I NEED YOU NOW!"

Less than a moment later, the door suddenly flew open, and Peepers was at last face to face with his master and potential destroyer.

The Great and Terrible Lord Hater.

"Ugh! Finally, I've been looking for you for like ten minutes." The cloaked skeleton said, sounding both relieved and irritated. "What are you even doing in here?"

"Uh… well… you see I…" the Supreme Watchdog stammered as he stealthily stuffed the newspaper into his back pocket. "I was just…"

"Never mind, I don't really care." Hater interrupted. "Listen, I need you to drop whatever you're doing and go find a place that serves lintel soup."

"What?" went Peepers, almost not believing what he'd just heard.

"Okay, so I was napping a little while ago, and I had this really vivid dream." Lord Hater explained, seemingly oblivious to his underling's confusion. "I was on a date with this super-hot chick, and we were both eating lintel soup. Only when I put it in my mouth it didn't taste like anything. Then when I woke up I remembered that I've never actually had lintel soup, and now I can't stop wondering what it tastes like. So I need you to go get me some; ASAP."

For what felt like an eternity, Commander Peepers just stood there in silence; completely stupefied by his master's insane request. Was this really happening, or was this all some sort of mad fever dream? Given his history, the Supreme Watchdog was willing to believe either explanation.

"So… let me get this straight." He said, finally breaking his silence. "You want me to just drop everything and go get you a bowl of soup, because you had a weird dream?"

"No, just a cup will be fine." Lord Hater answered. "I just wanna know what it tastes like and I'm not really sure I'm gonna like it."

"Sir, that has got to be the most ridicu…" Peepers argued, only to pause midsentence once he realized he could use this to his advantage. "Uh, I mean, I'd be more than happy to tackle this _important_ assignment for you, Sir."

"Good. Cuz this is like super important to me right now, and I'm not gonna be able to focus on anything else until I taste that soup." The cloaked skeleton replied; unknowingly providing exposition to those of you who are unfamiliar with his signature quirk.

"Oh, I understand completely Sir." The Supreme Watchdog said, almost patronizingly. "And rest assured, I will not stop until I've gotten you your soup. No matter how long it takes."

And with that said, the great Commander Peepers spun around and marched heroically towards his 'important' task; all the while doing summersaults in his mind over his unbelievable luck.

'I can't believe it! This is just too good to be true!' the Supreme Watchdog thought as he made his way to the opposite door. 'If I play my cards right, I can have him obsessing over this soup thing all week. By then the scandal will be old news and then everything can go back to normal. And no one has to die! Wham! Bam! Perfect Pla…'

"Uh, Peepers?"

"Yes Sir?"

"Why are you hiding that newspaper from me?"

And just like that, everything fell apart.

"N-N-N-Newspaper…" Peepers stammered as he slowly turned back around. "W-W-Wha-What newspaper?"

"The one you've got stuffed in your back pocket." The dark lord answered; suddenly sounding uncharacteristically serious.

"What? No…. don't be ridiculous…" the Supreme Watchdog said nervously as he feebly attempted to defuse the situation. "I don't have a newspaper. Who even reads those anymore? They're so low-tech and… and… and primitive and…."

"Hand it over!" Hater replied menacingly. "Now!"

"You know; you seem a little tense. Maybe you should wait until after you've had your soup."

"I SAID NOW!"

Faster than you could even blink, Lord Hater snatched the infamous article out of Peepers' pocket; sending the Watchdog Supreme into a state of pure panic.

"Sir, I was gonna show it to you in a few days, I swear! I just didn't want you to get upset!"

"Upset? Why would I be upset about the Chuud's losing the pennant?" the cloaked skeleton asked casually as he held up the sports page for his minion to see. "I don't even follow baseba… Oh wait, you meant I might get upset _**BECAUSE THE ENTIRE GALAXY IS LAUGHING AT ME!**_ "

To illustrate his point, Hater flipped the paper over so that Peepers could clearly see the front page, which read as follows.

 **Lord Hater: #1 Idiot.**

 _The world of Galactic Villainy was turned on its ear yesterday when the Ring of Invincibility worn by Lord Hater, planetary conqueror and founder of the infamous Hater Alliance, was revealed to be nothing more than a cheap candy ring; specifically, a Zamm-O Brand Ring-Lolli. This shocking revelation first came to light during the Alliance's failed invasion of planet Sik-Fel-Fax 17, home of the galaxy's best hot chocolate, when the supposedly invincible Hater was savagely beaten into semi-consciousness by beloved planet hopping hive-mind and author of the bestselling book 'Me, Myself, and Fifty Other Gals', Ms. Trudy Traveler. When asked how she felt about this accomplishment Ms. Traveler replied, "Meh, it was nothing"._

 _Several hours after this humiliating defeat, the Hater Alliance was dissolved back into its original factions and Lord Hater's rank on the Galactic Villain Leaderboard was lowered from Number 2 to Number 4; putting him just behind this year's Rookie of the Year, Ted the Merciless. Lord Hater himself could not be reached comment, but was last seen weeping like a little girl and repeatedly blaming Dominator for all of his misfortunes._

(Story Continued on Page 5)

To add even further insult to injury, the article also featured a large color photo depicting Lord Hater being clocked on the jaw by an elderly woman on a hover-scooter. Needless to say, he was not the least bit amused.

"RAAAAAAAAH!" the fallen tyrant roared as he viciously tore the offensive paper to shreds and then threw them into the air.

Unfortunately, this action did little to soothe his tortured spirit, for moments later he fell backwards and began sobbing like a baby.

"It's not fair! It's just not fair!" the cloaked skeleton wailed. "All I ever wanted was to rule the galaxy so everyone would see how cool and awesome I am. Is that so wrong?"

"Sir, with all due respect, suck it up." Peepers chimed in as he attempted to gain control of the situation. "I mean, when you think about it, things really aren't as bad as they seem. Sure, we've lost the Hater Alliance, but even without it you're still ranked fourth in the entire galaxy. Doesn't that count for something?"

"Ranks? What good are ranks when everyone's laughing at me?" Hater countered as he continued to sob uncontrollably. "Yesterday I was the leader of an unstoppable armada. Now I'm nothing but a joke! An incredibly handsome joke!"

"Sir, you're blowing this thing way out of proportions." The Supreme Watchdog said reassuringly. "I'm sure by next week no one will even remember what happened on Sik-Fel…"

"Yeah right!" Hater interrupted. "Face it, Peepers! I'm a laughingstock! And I'm always gonna be one! _Sniff._ Unless…"

"Unless?" Peepers parroted, sounding deeply, deeply concerned.

"Unless I do something drastic." The dark lord finished as he wiped the tears from his eyes and got back on his feet. "I know what I must do."

And with that said, he spun around and whooshed right out the door.

Sensing an inevitable disaster, Peepers hurried right after him; once again in full panic mode.

"Sir! Wait! Please, just stop and think for a second!" he screamed frantically as his brained worked overtime to think of something, anything he could say to stop his master from doing something stupid and/or potentially life-threatening. "What about your soup?"

End Notes:

Well, that's the end of this one folks. I hope you liked it.

As I'm sure you've already guessed, the Galactic Villain Community has gone through several major power shifts since the events of The First Date. So just to give you a vague idea of the current pecking order, he's the latest Top 10 on the GVLB.

1\. Lord Dominator (Naturally)

2\. Emperor Awesome (Don't ask me how)

3\. Ted the Merciless (Turns out he has a real knack for villainy, who knew?)

4\. Lord Hater (You already knew that)

5\. The Night Mayor (Not in it for the ranks)

6\. Sourdough the Evil Sandwich (No real surprise here)

7\. Gentleman Tooth (This boy came outta nowhere)

8\. Little Bits (Finally being taken seriously by the GV Community)

9\. Mandrake the Malfeasant (A miracle he's even still alive)

10\. General McGuffin (Didn't get deep-fried in this universe, FYI)

So that's that. Please remember to follow, fav, and review. And I'll see you all next time. Peace.


	3. Chapter 2

Hello everyone, and welcome to the next chapter of The Revenge. Not a whole lot to say this time, so let's just get right into it. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 2.

Time: 13:25 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Lord Hater's Skullship.

For what felt like hours, Commander Peepers searched high and low, but could find neither cloak nor cowl of his malevolent master.

After being reminded of his most recent public humiliation, Lord Hater had vowed to take drastic action in order to restore his shattered reputation, but given his track record, such a vow could only end in catastrophe. So if the Supreme Watchdog was going to save his lord's nonexistent skin, not to mention his own, he needed to act fast.

Having already eliminated the Torture Room, the Armory, and the Bridge, there was only one other room on the ship where Lord Hater could go to try and make good on his threat; the Communications Room. So with all the speed and grace of a jackrabbit possessed, Peepers rushed towards the room in question, in the hopes of nipping this potential disaster in the bud.

'Oh please, oh please, oh please, oh please,' the Grand Watchdog thought worriedly as he turned the final corner; now less than a stone's throw away from his final destination. 'Oh please, oh please don't let me be too late.'

Within moments he was through the automatic doors and in the Communications Room, where, much to his relief, he found his master hunched over one of the larger terminals; apparently still typing whatever message he intended to send.

'Oh thank Grop," Peepers thought with overwhelming relief. 'I'm not too late. I still have time to…'

" **Message Sent.** " Said the voice of the computer terminal; causing the Supreme Watchdog's heart to stop.

"Oh… _shoot_ …"

Suddenly feeling very, very, very weak in the knees, Peepers stumbled slowly toward his fearless leader; his one eye twitching nervously all the while. Once he was finally close enough, the Grand Watchdog stopped dead in his tacks and looked up at him.

"Sir…" he said; his voice dripping with mortal terror. "What did you just _do_?"

Clearly not sharing his minion's fears, the dark lord spun around, and with an arrogant smirk etched across his face, he answered.

"Something brilliant."

XXX

( _Meanwhile, in another part of the galaxy_ )

Deep within the large and imposing death factory that was Lord Dominator's Lava-Ship, the queen of darkness herself, known as Deedee to a certain special someone, was sitting on her molten throne in front of a massive assembly of her loyal Dominator Probes.

This, in and of itself, was nothing all that unusual, but what really had the lava-bots struggling to compute, was the fact that their normally blood crazed, death obsessed lord and master was sitting sideways in her throne, staring off into space with a dreamy look in her eyes and a dopy grin on her face.

For the most part she just sat there in silence, which was only broken whenever she let out an occasional sigh of ecstasy. And although the probes in attendance lacked the cognitive power to understand what was happening, they all knew the reason why. They all knew it was because of the strange, heart shaped box that had mysteriously appeared in Lord Dominator's bedroom earlier that morning. And they were right, of course, because this box was just the latest in a long line of 'Just Because Presents' given to the mad seductress by her new boyfriend, Wander.

And what exactly had the furry nomad sent her to send her into such a state? Well… that's actually quite hard to say. Mainly because Dominator hadn't opened it yet. In fact, since finding the box in her room three hours ago, the lovesick psychopath had only read the card attached to it. And yet that alone had been enough to drown her senses in saccharine sentimentality.

Had she been in her right mind, she'd have been totally embarrassed.

"To my Darling wittle Honey Pot," she said for what felt like billionth time as she recited the card from memory. "May this gift make your day as sweet as you make all of mine. _Love_ , your Precious wittle Pumpkin."

What came next could only be described as a girlish squeal mixed with a lustful cackle.

"Oh~ This is just too perfect!" said the lime-skinned maiden, still drunk with happiness. "Wander loves me~ Wander loves me~ Wander loves _meeeeeeeeeee_ ~"

She sang and swooned so fervently that she nearly fell out of her throne.

"But now that I've got him, where do I go from here?" she asked herself, her tone suddenly turning serious. "Hmm, I suppose the best course of action would be to… get him into bed~"

Her dopey grin quickly turned sinister as Dominator's eyes filled with a dark, animalistic lust.

"Shouldn't be too hard, I am a goddess after all." She said in a tone both boastful and amorous. "Sure, I'll just lure him into my parlor with this oh-so amazing body of mine and then after one night of wild, animal lovin', he'll be addicted to me for life. After that it'll just be a matter of time until I blacken his heart and turn him into my Prince of Darkness. Then we'll travel the universe together, and bathe the cosmos in the blood of…"

" **Incoming Message.** " Said Dominator Probe #13; cutting her graphic soliloquy short.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~" squealed Dominator, as she seamlessly slipped back into bubbly schoolgirl mode. "OMG! I bet it's from Wander. He probably wants to make sure I got my present. AH~ That is soooooo like him~"

While the destroyer of worlds continued to gush like a love drunk sailor girl, her minions just hovered in almost stunned silence.

"Well, what are idiots waiting for?" she asked them, sounding more than slightly irritated. "One of you put it up on the big screen. NOW!"

Less than half a second later, the drones combined all of their holo-projectors to form one massive floating screen; on which was displayed Dominator's main email account.

Unfortunately, any excitement she still contained was immediately replaced with even more irritation once she read the name on the email.

"Oh what? Boo!" she said angrily as she crossed her arms in childish frustration. "It's from that stupid dork Hater. Ugh! Man, what a gyp!"

As she slumped into her throne and pouted, much of her anger faded away and was quickly replaced by benign boredom.

"Meh, whatever." She said halfheartedly. "Might as well see what the idiot wants."

XXX

( _Back on the Skullship_ )

"YOU CHALLENGED LORD DOMINATOR TO A DUEL!" the Supreme Watchdog yelled; his tone both accusing and panic-stricken. "ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND!"

"Yeah, out of my mind like a fox." Hater replied; butchering a time-tested metaphor. "Wait, are you seriously mad at me? You're the one who's always telling me I need to take this villain stuff more seriously. I thought you'd be proud of me for taking some initiative."

"Sir, this is not initiative. This is suicide!" Peepers replied worriedly. "What made you think this was a good idea?"

"Uh, prison movies, duh!" The cloaked skeleton answered, but when he was met with nothing but a confused stare he began to elaborate. "Look, you know how in every prison movie ever, the only way to become the top guy on the cellblock is to take on the biggest, strongest guy they've got? Well, it's the same basic principle here."

"Yeah, except for the part where this isn't a movie!" the Commander argued. "Sir, I know you're strong, but in a one-on-one fight Dominator will kill you."

"Then we won't fight him one-on-one." Hater reasoned. "We'll lure him in, and then we'll ram every ounce of our military might right down his stupid throat!"

"But Sir, we'd need the entire Hater Alliance just to…"

"WE DON'T NEED THOSE BACKSTABBING PHONIES!" Hater roared venomously before quickly calming back down. "We already have a loyal army of Watchdogs right here on this ship. They can handle Dominator."

"Sir, even if that were true, half of our main forces are still in the infirmary. And after what happened yesterday, most of the other half are threatening to go on strike."

"I told you letting them form a union was a stupid idea."

"Oh no, we are **not** having this argument again."

"Whatever! Then we'll just pad our remaining forces with some recruits from the other departments. I'm pretty sure Simmons in HR used to be a street fighter."

"Simmons is a pathological liar!"

"Well it's not like we have a lot of options Peepers!" the dark lord argued. "I mean, Dominator's probably already read my email by now. And after all the nasty things I said about him, there's no way he won't accept my challenge."

And for the second time that day, Peepers felt his heart stop.

He was right.

Lord Hater was absolutely right.

The message was already sent. There was no way to take it back. This duel was happening, and there was literally nothing he could do to stop it.

"Oh boy…"

XXX

( _Back with Dominator_ )

"So in conclusion, not only are you a total poser for stealing my look, but you are also an ignorant monkey." The mad villainess said as she read over Lord Hater's email; sounding totally bored out of her skull. "Congrats again to your Mother for marrying her Brother. Come and get me. Lord Hater."

Once she was finished, Dominator sat in silence for a few moments to let it all sink in.

"Wow… that was… _beyond_ pathetic." She said, still sounding a little bored. "I mean seriously, what is this guy, twelve? Does he honestly think I'm gonna fight him just because he sends me an email? What a loser."

True to her character, the lime-skinned seductress had a good cheap laugh at the lesser villain's expense.

However, once the novelty started to wear off, the boredom started setting back in.

That is, until a very interesting idea bubbled up to the forefront of her twisted little brain.

"Ya know…" she said, as the aforementioned idea began to take shape. "There just might be a way I can have some fun with this."

XXX

( _Back on the Skullship_ )

Peepers was on the verge of having a full-scale panic attack.

His palms were sweaty, his heart was pounding, and his vision grew blurrier with each passing second.

He thought for sure he was going to pass out.

Then he realized something.

Something that made his heart swell with joy.

'Wait… what am I getting so worked up for?' he thought as his blood pressure started to go down. 'This is Dominator we're talking about. The most antisocial villain in galactic villain history. The last time we met, he barely even acknowledged our existence. There's no way he'll accept Lord Hater's challenge. He probably won't even open the email.'

" **Incoming Message.** " Said the voice of the adjacent computer terminal; essentially shattering the Supreme Watchdogs hopes for a nonviolent resolution.

Not wasting a single second, Lord Hater feverishly opened his awaited reply; which read as follows.

 **WorldBreaker96** replied to **SkeletorElectrico#1SuperStar:**

 _Tomorrow. Skrillpon 5. High Noon. If you try to run, I'll hunt you down._

And… that was the final nail in the coffin.

Peepers didn't bother voicing his immeasurable concern.

He didn't even bother listening to whatever orders his master was about to give him.

No, he just did what any normal, relatively sane person would do in his situation.

He fainted.

End Notes:

Well… that's the end of another one folks. Hope it was to your liking. Please remember to follow, favorite, and leave a review before you leave. See you next time. Peace.


	4. Chapter 3

Hello everybody, and welcome to the next Chapter of 'The Revenge'. Not much to say, yet again. So… Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 3.

Time: 18:16 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Lord Hater's Skullship.

After being roused from his terror induced comma by about three or four bottles of Svokian smelling salts, Peepers had been ordered to rally whatever troops he could scrounge up and prepare them for tomorrow's attack.

Unfortunately, as the Supreme Watchdog had predicted, finding willing volunteers for such an insane assignment among their remaining forces was no easy task. The War for the Ring of Invincibility had drastically reduced the number of active Watchdogs in the field. Of those who were not still in the infirmary, a solid 42% had yet to be cleared for active duty by their doctors. Another 27% were threatening to go on strike unless they received a Cost of Living increase, while yet another 20% had simply vanished without a trace; rumor has it they went AWOL to avoid any future embarrassments caused by their leader. What remained was, for the most part, a pathetic rabble of poorly trained, inexperienced foot soldiers who had been out of the academy less than a week.

Following his master's advice, Peepers attempted to pad these numbers by drafting members of various other departments and providing them with a crash course in basic field maneuvers and firearm techniques. But even with their new recruits, the grand total was still just a little over eight hundred; nowhere near enough to takedown someone like Dominator.

When the Grand Watchdog informed his master of this fact, Lord Hater ordered him to assemble every member of R&D in his throne room ASAP and to tell them to, quote 'bring their A-Game'. Obviously the cloaked skeleton believed that one of his scientists might be working on something they could use to tip the scales in the coming battle. Unfortunately, Peepers did not share his optimism.

Which leads us to the absurd scene about to take place.

"Alright boys," Lord Hater called to his loyal army of eggheads and tinkerers. "Show me what you got. Peepers, who's up first?"

"That would be Bob, Sir." Answered Peepers from his position beside his master's throne; his tone betraying his total lack of faith in this exercise. "Bob, you ready on your end?"

"All set, Boss." Replied the Watchdog scientist as he stood eagerly in front of the prepared projector screen; pointing stick at the ready.

"Alright then, Bobby." The dark lord said nonchalantly as he leaned back into his reclining throne. "Wow me."

"Sir yes Sir." The cycloptic scientist said, with an almost game show host level of enthusiasm. "Friends, Colleagues, Esteemed Tyrannical Overlords, allow me to introduce to you the latest addition to the Hater Empire's ever-expanding arsenal."

As if responding to his verbal cue, an unseen projector suddenly turned on; displaying what appeared to be the blueprints for a small, handheld disco ball.

"Behold! The Party Bomb!" Bob said dramatically as he directed everyone's attention to the central diagram. "Now, I know what you're all thinking, 'Bob, that just looks like a tiny disco ball', and you're right, it does. But, in reality, it's a miniature sonic device that, when activated, emits a powerful hypnotic signal that forces everyone within a two-mile radius to dance uncontrollably for up to eighteen hours!"

After that last bit, Bob paused for what was supposed to be dramatic effect. Unfortunately, all it did was add to the already intense air of awkwardness that threatened to suffocate the room.

"So… any questions?"

"Yeah, I've got one." Said Lord Hater, sounding more than slightly irritated. "What are you, nuts?"

"What?" replied Bob defensively. "It's a _bomb_ that makes people _dance_. You gotta admit this is cool!"

"No, _cool_ describes what an air conditioner does. _Stupid_ describes what you're talking about."

"But Sir, I…"

" _NEXT!_ "

Then without another word, Bob marched away in disgrace, only to be replaced by another Watchdog a few seconds later.

"Alright Carl, show that loser how a _real_ scientist does it." The dark lord said to the replacement pitchman.

"With pleasure, Sir." The new Watchdog replied confidently. "Gentleman, feast your eyes on… The Scylla Tank!"

A split-second later, the image of the miniature disco ball was replaced by that of what appeared to be a nine headed mechanical dragon.

"Folks, I'm not gonna bore you with all the complicated, technical details, so I'll just get straight to the point." Carl said in a disturbingly salesmanesque fashion. "This baby is a four-hundred-ton, nearly indestructible, flying war machine capable of breathing fire, ice, lightning, poison gas, and a whole host of other cool stuff."

"I never realized it until just now, but I've always wanted one of those!" said Lord Hater excitedly; practically drooling over his prospective new toy. "Okay, meeting's over. Carl wins. Everybody else get lost."

"Not so fast." Peepers interrupted; assuming his trademark no-nonsense attitude. "What's the catch?"

"No catch, no catch." The minor Watchdog answered sleazily. "I just need ninety trillion hate-a-zoids so I can have the power core shipped overnight, and then you'll be good to go."

"No problem! Peepers, write this man a check!"

"Um Sir, might I have a word with you." The Grand Watchdog said as he pulled his master aside for a private chat. "Two things. 1. This is obviously a scam. And 2. Even if it wasn't, we don't have ninety trillion hate-a-zoids to spend. Ted embezzled five times that much before he went solo. Remember? As it stands, we can barely afford to keep the lights on."

As if to emphasis his point, the lightbulb directly above Hater's throne suddenly began to flicker.

"Ugh! I hate it when you're right!" the cloaked skeleton said childishly before turning his attention back to the conman in front of him. "Sorry Carl. Commander Killjoy says we can't afford it right now. Maybe next time."

"I'll be waiting." Said the diminutive bunko artist as he stepped aside; allowing another Watchdog Scientist to take his place.

"Okay, show of hands." Said the replacement egghead enthusiastically. "Who here hates fighting their own battles?"

"We don't have all night, Jimmy!" Lord Hater interrupted. "So cut the sales pitch and just get to the point!"

"Okay, Okay, yeesh." replied Jimmy as he tugged on his shirt collar nervously, before quickly regaining his composure. "Gentleman, I give you… The Tunneler!"

A split-second later, the image on the screen switched to that of a small but admittedly cool looking gun.

"The awesome name is the first pro, obviously." The Watchdog continued confidently. "The second pro is that this baby opens a portal to an alternate universe. Unleashing an ancient Elder God who will do all our fighting for us."

"Now that's what I'm talkin' about!" the dark lord said ecstatically. "Summoning an Elder God! That's like video game level villainy! Sign me up!"

"Not so fast." Peepers cut in; once again in no nonsense mode. "Are there any cons?"

"Oh yeah, plenty." Jimmy answered, sounding much too frank for his own good. "For one thing, there's no way to control whatever Elder God we summon, and once they're out those things are almost impossible to send back. But let me tell ya, the _real_ con is that after all that beta testing, I've been completely desensitized to gore and mayhem."

"Ugh! You _guys_!" Lord Hated groaned angrily. "My duel with Dominator is tomorrow! What do we have that _works_?"

"The Party Bomb~"

"I mean besides that!" the cloaked skeleton roared furiously. "Come on! One of you must have something I can use! Something that's not completely stupid!"

"Well…" said an unseen Watchdog from somewhere in the far back. "There's always that Top Secret Project Commander Peepers has been working on."

"Top Secret Project?" the dark lord parroted before shooting his second-in-command an accusatory glare. "What top secret project?"

"Uh…" the Grand Watchdog replied nervously; sweat dripping from every pore. "Funny story about that."

XXX

( _Elsewhere in the Galaxy_ )

"Hmm… Now let me see…" said Wander as he examined the contents of his seemingly ordinary wicker picnic basket. "Cold Chicken, Cold Tongue, Cold Ham, Cold Beef, Aged Cheddar, Aged Swiss, Smoked Gouda, Mustard, Mayo, French Rolls, Apples, Oranges, Peaches, Plums, Pears, Picked Gherkin Salad, Cress Sandwiches, Potted Meat, Potted Lobster, Sardines, Melba Toast, Lemon Squares, Snickerdoodles, Strawberry Pie, Ginger Beer, Lemonade, Soda Pop. Gee, I hope I'm not forgetting something."

"Don't cha think that's a little much for just two people?" asked Sylvia from her relaxed position on the opposite end of the campsite.

"Well, we haven't been going out all that long. So I'm not really sure what she likes." The furry nomad answered casually. "Besides, you never know, I might run into some poor, hungry traveler while I'm on my way to meet her."

"Fair enough." The blue Zbornak replied before giving her long neck a much needed crack. "But seriously, if we're gonna get an early start tomorrow, we should probably go ahead and hit the hay."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Replied the furry wanderer as he stuffed the wicker basket into his 'magic' hat and walked over to join his companion.

Within minutes, their campfire was safely doused and the two friends took their usual sleeping positions; Sylvia curled up into a ball on the hard ground with Wander on her back, using his endlessly versatile hat as a makeshift sleeping bag.

"Goodnight, Sylvia." Said the nomad as he closed his eyes and readied himself for dreamland.

"Goodnight, Wander." Replied the Zbornak as she attempted to do the same. Unfortunately, before she could fully allow herself to drift off into the Land of Morpheus, there was something she needed to get off her chest. "Hey, Wander."

"Yeah, Syl?

"Don't you find it a little suspicious that Dominator…"

"Deedee."

"Whatever! That _she_ would just call you out of the blue and demand you take her on a picnic on some random planet you've never heard of?"

"Well, first of all, Deedee didn't _demand_ anything, she asked me nicely." Wander corrected her gently. "And second, no, I don't find it suspicious at all."

"But, Skrillpon 5? I looked it up, and it's out in the middle of nowhere; not to mention totally barren."

"Maybe she likes barren." The furry nomad suggested. "Some people find starkness quite beautiful. Even romantic. Maybe she saw a picture of it online and got so excited that she just had to see it for herself."

"How can you be so optimistic? You're dealing with a psychopath for Grop's sake."

"Sylvia, Sylvia, Sylvia." He replied in an almost paternal manner. "If you want someone to change for the better, you have to be willing to give them the benefit of the doubt."

"And what makes you think she _can_ change?"

"Because, she's just like me."

"You keep saying that, but…"

"Look, it's complicated." Wander cut her off. "You wouldn't understand."

"And just what is _that_ supposed to mean?" the Zbornak shot back; sounding more than slightly insulted.

"It's complicated."

"You keep saying that too, but you never…"

" _It's. Complicated._ " He cut her off once again; this time making it clear that he did not wish to discuss the matter any further.

"Fine, be that way." Sylvia said with a huff as she set her head back down.

For about a minute or so, the blue Zbornak just laid there and fumed silently over her companion's refusal to cooperate. Eventually however, her frustration gave way to other emotions, and she spoke up again.

"Hey… Wander…."

"Yeah Syl?"

"There's… something I've been meaning to ask you."

"What is it?"

"Well… it's just…" she began nervously; clearly searching for just the right phrasing. "Back at the Asteroid Formation, you kinda made it sound like you were willing to marry Dominator no matter who wins your game. But… you were just kidding right? I mean, you'd never actually marry someone like her… right?"

"I don't know." Wander answered matter-of-factly. "I might."

"What? You can't be serious."

"Hey, I don't know what's gonna happen in the future. Maybe we'll get married. Maybe we won't. We're just gonna have to wait and see."

"This isn't a joke, Wander! Marriage is a serious commitment!"

"I know; I've been married before."

" _ **What!**_ " the blue Zbornak exclaimed; clearly flabbergasted by this sudden revelation. "What did you just…"

Unfortunately, Wander cut her off yet again; only this time it was with a rather loud snore.

"Wander, I know you're faking. This isn't gonna work."

The hairy nomad said nothing; replying with just another snore.

"I'm not buying it, Wander. No one falls asleep that fast."

Again, he just replied with a snore.

"Oh come on! You can't just drop a bombshell like that on me and expect me to just…"

And yet again, she was cut off by a snore.

"Fine! You wanna be Mr. Mysterious, be my guest!"

And with that said, she lowered her head and tucked it into her usual sleeping position.

"But one of these days, you're gonna give me a straight answer." She muttered to herself angrily. "Whether you like it or not."

End Notes:

Writing is fun, but editing is painful. I meant to have this up on Sunday, but work plus the long and arduous tasks of editing and proofreading made that impossible. Hope it was worth the wait. See you all in the next one. Peace.


	5. Chapter 4

Hello everybody, and welcome to the next chapter of The Revenge. Before we get started, there's just one little thing I'd like to make clear; this series is an AU. Granted, I try to keep the characters, settings, etcetera, as close to the mainstream continuity as possible, but still, certain events in this timeline will be radically different from the show; in the past, the present, and the future. I say this because the final five episodes of WOY are set to premiere over the next few weeks, and since I've already pretty much mapped out where I want this series to go, I want to make something else clear; from this point on, any new information we get about Wander or Dominator's backstories, I will more than likely be disregarding. Unless it's something small and vague enough for me to work into what I've already planned. So, with that said, 'Wander over Yonder' is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 4.

Time: 11:59 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Skrillpon 5.

It was just your typical day on Skrillpon 5.

Which in other words meant it was a bleak and thoroughly unappealing day.

For, as you may not be aware, the fifth planet of the Skrillpon System was completely barren; save for a few sickly looking shrubs which provided this dismal little rock with just enough oxygen to make it habitable. However, the breathable atmosphere was almost superfluous, since the planet was totally uninhabited and the only people who ever visited were local bail jumpers looking for a place to lay low.

At least, that's how things were on an average day.

However, before it was finished, this day would prove to be anything but average.

 _ **CRACK!**_

 _ **BOOM!**_

The drab skies above turned a dark emerald as the air was suddenly shattered by a tremendous explosion of venomous green lightning. High winds swept across the barren plains; whipping up clouds of strange, ash-like material for miles around. However, just as quickly as these strange phenomena began, they mysteriously ceased. And all was quiet once again.

Seconds later, this quiet was disrupted by a new and equally monstrous noise; this time in the form of loud death metal music. For almost two solid minutes, the raucous music played; blasting at decibels that would shatter the skulls of most species. But as the horrid music blared on, the grey clouds above began to part; revealing the unmistakable visage of Lord Hater's infamous Skull Ship.

Slowly but steadily, the imposing warship lowered itself into the planet's atmosphere. Inch by inch. Foot by foot. Until finally, the hulking structure was hovering mere yards above the surface.

Within moments, the mouth of the great ship was open, and dozens upon dozens of Watchdog Soldiers were pouring down the ramp; all of them chanting 'HATE'S GREAT, BEST VILLAIN! HATE'S GREAT, BEST VILLAIN!'. Before long, they were all outside, and forming what appeared to be a roadway; with about four hundred or so foot soldiers standing on either side.

Then, he appeared.

Like a bat out of hell, the great and terrible Lord Hater came barreling down the tongue-ramp; driving what appeared to be a custom-made assault vehicle, one that seemed to have been modeled after his own face.

Once he reached the surface, the dark lord drove his magnificent ego-mobile down the Watchdog runway; earning a salute from each minion he passed. Until at last he made it to the dead center of his impressive invasion force; where he brought the vehicle to a sudden stop and stood up on his seat.

"DOMINATOR!" the cloaked skeleton roared as he unleashed a blast of green lightning from each of his hands. "COME OUT AND FACE ME COWARD!"

"Uh, Sir." Said Commander Peepers as he suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

"FOR I, LORD HATER, HAVE COME TO SMITE THEE!"

"Sir~"

"AND PROVE ONCE AND FOR ALL, THAT I AM THE GREATEST IN THE…"

"SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIR!"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!"

"THERE'S NO ONE HERE!"

"WHAT?"

"I SAID, THERE'S NO ONE HERE!"

"WHAT?"

"I SAID, THERE'S NO… TURN OFF THAT MUSIC!"

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU! HOLD ON, I'M GONNA TURN MY MUSIC OFF!" Lord Hater said before pushing a button on one of his signature yellow gloves; effectively silencing the awful din. "Okay, now what's so important that you had to interrupt my speech?"

"I was trying to tell you that we're the only ones here." Peepers explained; sounding more than a little agitated. "Dominator hasn't arrived yet. We appear to be early."

"But… but that was like my best entrance ever." The dark lord whined.

"Yeah, totally!" chimed in one of the Watchdogs in formation.

"The part with the lightning gave me chills~" said another.

"Well, I'm sorry, Sir." Peepers continued, ignoring the comments from the peanut gallery. "But according to my scanners, Lord Dominator's ship is at least five parsecs away. We're just gonna have to wait."

"Aw man!" the cloaked skeleton whined again before crossing his arms and pouting. "What a gyp!"

"Um… Boss," said one of the adjacent foot soldiers. "Do you want us to go back in the ship so we can set everything up again, or…"

"Nah, the moment's ruined. Let's just sit here and wait for that jerk to show up." Lord Hater commanded as he slumped into his driver's seat. "Did anyone bring a deck of cards or something?"

XXX

( _Meanwhile, on Skrillpon 4)_

"Are you sure you don't wanna come?" Wander asked his Zbornak companion as they stood outside the planet's only manmade structure; a rather dingy looking Orbble Station/Diner. "I mean; I know it's supposed to be a romantic picnic. But I've got more than enough food, and I'm sure Deedee wouldn't mind."

"Yeah… as tempting as that sounds, something tells me I'll have more fun hanging out here." Sylvia said dryly, as she gestured toward the seedy looking dive behind her.

"Are you sure?" the hairy nomad asked concernedly. "I'm not usually one to pass judgment, but this place doesn't look very clean."

"Wander, let me tell you a little story." The blue Zbornak said for no apparent reason. "When I was twelve, my dad lost his job. So to save money, I had to have my wisdom teeth taken out by a shoemaker. _**That**_ was less painful than having to listen to you swap pet names with Little Miss Planet Buster."

"Okay, if that's how you feel." Wander said with a shrug. "I'll be back in like six hours. Try not to have too much fun without me."

"I won't, pal. I won't."

And with that bit of jocularity out of the way, the two friends went their separate ways for the afternoon. However, just before Wander could walk out of earshot, Sylvia called him back.

"Hey, Wander."

"Yeah, Sylvia?"

"About last night,"

"Water under the bridge, Syl. It's no big deal."

"Yes it is." The blue Zbornak said in an almost somber kind of way. "Look, I… I know you don't like to talk about your past, and that's fine. I like who you are. I don't need to know who you were. But… to say that I wouldn't understand, after everything we've been through together, that… that just… I don't even know man."

"Sylvia, I'm really sorry, it's just… my life is…"

"Complicated, I know, and if you don't wanna tell me about it that's fine. But can you at least tell me why you think I wouldn't understand? I've earned that much, haven't I?"

For what felt like an eternity, Wander gave no reply. He didn't speak. He didn't move. Sylvia had to squint just to make sure her little buddy was still breathing.

"Alright, I'll tell you." He said finally, after a full minute of silence. "But you're not gonna like the answer."

"Wander, this is _me_ we're talkin' about." Sylvia replied confidently. "Whatever it is, I can take it."

"Okay, if you're sure." Wander began, pausing only for a second to let out an audible _gulp_. "Sylvia… when was the last time you saw your family?"

"What?"

"I'll bet it was the day you left. The day you left your home planet forever and never looked back."

"It's been… awhile, yeah, but what does that have to do with anything?"

"Everything." The furry wanderer answered simply. "Sylvia, you're out here because you want to be. You chose to travel the universe; first with Ryder, then by yourself, then with me. You chose this life… but I didn't."

The blue Zbornak gave out a loud gasp of disbelief, but Wander continued before she could interrupt him.

"Now, don't get me wrong. I love this life. I love meeting new people and seeing new things. It's just…" the hairy wanderer paused for a moment, clearly looking for just the right words. "Sylvia, if I thought, even for a second, that I could go back home, I'd do it. I'd run there as fast as I could and I'd never leave. Ever. And when I look into her eyes, I know that deep down Deedee feels the same way."

Another silence fell over the duo, but this one lasted only half as long.

"Silvia, in all my life, I've never met someone I enjoy spending time with as much as you. That's why you're my best friend." Wander said warmly. "But you can never really understand what it's like to be me. No one can… except maybe her. That's why this is so important to me. That's why I _need_ to see this through. I hope you can at least understand that."

"Yeah… I understand." Sylvia replied softly. "At least, I think I do."

"Good." The furry nomad said before seamlessly slipping back into his normal cheerful demeanor. "Cuz I've had enough of being a downer for one day."

The sudden change in her companion's mood was enough to put a smile on the blue Zbornak's face. Unfortunately, it did little to quell the storm clouds in her mind.

Over the past few weeks, Sylvia had seen several new sides of her furry little friend; not all of them she was sure she liked. And although she'd professed that such things didn't bother her, every now and then she would catch herself wondering.

'Who are you, Wander?'

XXX

( _Back on Skrillpon 5_ )

"Ugh! What's taking him so long?" Lord Hater whined as he slumped and fidgeted in the seat of his ridiculous looking all terrain assault vehicle. "This is soooooooooooooooooo boring!"

"Sir, any minute now we could be thrown headlong into a fight for our lives against one of the most dangerous psychopaths in existence." Peepers said, his tone betraying every drop of his fear and aggravation. " _How_ can you _possibly_ be _**bored**_?"

"It's not easy." The dark lord replied. "But it just goes to show how amazing I am."

And with that, the Grand Watchdog's one eye began to twitch uncontrollably.

"What are you getting so worked up about anyway? With this sick freeze ray you built me, we can't lose." He added confidently; pointing at the device mounted on the back of his car.

"Sir, as I _tried_ to tell you last night, the Frostonium Ray is _not_ ready for field application." Peepers said, as he desperately tried to make his master see the true gravity of their situation. "It takes thirty-six hours just to charge, and it's only good for one shot."

"One shot is all we need." Hater interrupted, once again sounding overly confident. "Trust me, once this baby gets rolling, Dominator's not gonna stand a chance."

"Sir, I know you're excited to play with your new toy. And I'll admit, it's kind of impressive that you were able to build something like this all on your own. But face the facts, the only way your Haterv is going to stop Dominator is if he sees it and laughs himself into a comma."

"First of all, its HATE-RV. I know you're saying it wrong on purpose just to bug me." The dark lord said angrily. "And Second, do you have any gum?"

" _What_? No! Why?"

"I keep hearing this weird whistling sound. I think my ears need to be popped."

"Sir, we've been over this, you don't have ea… wait, now I hear it too. What is that?"

"It kinda sounds like a teakettle. Is someone making tea? Peepers, go get me some tea."

"It's not a teakettle, Sir. Don't be ridiculous. But you know… it almost sounds like something from one of those old cartoons. Like that sound effect you hear whenever something's falling from the…"

 _ **BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!**_

End Notes:

Well, that's that. See you all next time. Peace.


	6. Chapter 5

Hello everyone, and welcome to the latest chapter of The Revenge. Before we get started, just a quick FYI, Dominator is referred to as a 'he' in this chapter. This is because it is told from Peepers' perspective and at this time Peepers doesn't yet know that Dominator is a girl. Now that we've got that cleared up; Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 5.

Time: 12:33 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Skrillpon 5.

" _ **Wakey Wakey~**_ " said a deep and ominous voice from out of the infinite darkness. " _ **Rise and shine~**_ "

"Uh… whaza… what's happening?" Commander Peepers mumbled as the world slowly came back into focus. "Where am I?"

" _ **Up a creek without a paddle.**_ " Answered the ominous voice from before, only this time there was a face to go with it; a very, very, **very** familiar face. " _ **Morning, Sunshine~**_ "

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" the Supreme Watchdog screamed at the top of his lungs as the full scope of his situation came into view.

There he was, at the bottom of what appeared to be an enormous crater; trapped in the fiery grasp of Lord Dominator. Beside him, trapped in the molten madman's opposite hand, was his master, Lord Hater; looking thoroughly battered and bruised. High above, dotted around the edge of the aforementioned crater like a bunch of lawn jockeys, stood what remained of their 'mighty' Watchdog army; each and every one of them too terrified to even lift a finger.

So in other words, things were going pretty much as he'd expected.

"Hey, not so loud!" Lord Hater whined. "For Grop's sake Peepers, that went right in my eardrum."

"Sir! Are you okay?" the Grand Watchdog asked his disheveled master; his voice dripping with panic. "Where's the ship? Where's the Frostonium Ray? What happened?"

" _ **You wanna know what happened?**_ " Dominator said tauntingly. " _ **I'll tell you what happened. I showed up. They panicked. You fainted. He cried. And now this is happening.**_ "

"I didn't cry!" Lord Hater shot back defensively.

" _ **You cried~**_ " Dominator replied mockingly.

"A rock hit me in the face!"

" _ **And then you cried~**_ "

"My body was reacting!"

" _ **To the desire to cry~**_ "

"Oh yeah! Well…. You're dumb!"

" _ **Ooooo~ Brilliant comeback. How many brain cells did you burn thinking that one up?**_ "

"Oh yeah! Well, you're a… a…. a… weenie!"

" _Enough_!" yelled Peepers; his tone betraying just how well and truly sick of this conversation he was. "Sir, we're about to be burned alive! Can you _please_ just shut up for five seconds so we can at least _die_ with _dignity_?"

"You know Peepers; I'm getting _real_ sick of this pessimistic attitude of yours." The dark lord shot back. "Maybe if you'd spent less time complaining and more time coming up with a battle plan, we wouldn't be in this mess."

"Are you _seriously_ trying to pin all this on me?"

"Yup!" the cloaked skeleton replied bluntly. "In fact, I'm starting to think that your negative attitude is the reason I'm stuck in Fourth Place!"

"Why you son of a… After everything I've done for… You are just so… so…"

"So what, Peepers? So _what_? Come on! If we're about to die, then why bother holding back! Go on! Hit me with your best shot!"

"I would, but you'd probably just start crying again!"

"I NEVER CRIED!"

" _ **Both of you, shut up!**_ " Dominator roared, reminding his two captives just who was in control of this situation. " _ **For Grop's sake. You're gonna give me a migraine. Now listen up, cuz I'm only gonna say this once. Killing you two bozos would be a huge waste of my time. So just this once, I'm letting you losers off the hook.**_ "

And with that said, the molten madman retracted his glowing tendrils; dropping his captives on the cold, hard ground.

"So… that's it?" Peepers asked hesitantly as he picked himself up out of the dirt. "After all that, you're just gonna let us go? Just like that?"

" _ **Did I frickin' stutter?**_ " Dominator replied threateningly.

"No, no, no, no, no," the Supreme Watchdog said in a frantic yet polite fashion. "You were quite clear. Crystal in fact. We'll just be going now. Come along, Sir."

"Not so fast!" Lord Hater roared as he finally got back on his feet. "I came here for a duel, and I'm not leaving until I get one!"

" _ **You're kidding, right?**_ "

"Of course he's kidding!" Peepers cut in, sounding almost manic. "Go ahead, Sir. Tell him you were kidding!"

"No I wasn't!" the dark lord spat stubbornly. "I'm not leaving until I kick your butt and prove that I'm still Number 1!"

" _ **Ugh! Don't tell me this is about that stupid leaderboard.**_ "

"No! It's about me! And how you stole my tittle!" Hater countered; his rage slowly mixing with sorrow as his eyes began to water. "It's not fair! I was a big cheese! A HUGE cheese! But now look at me! I'm nothing but a has-been! A wash-up! A _joke_!"

Before anyone even knew what had happened, the cloaked skeleton fell to his knees and began sobbing uncontrollably. Ever the shoulder to cry on, Peepers walked up behind his wailing master and gave him the traditional 'there-there' pat on the back.

Dominator however, was not so sympathetic.

" _ **Wow… you are**_ **beyond** _ **pathetic.**_ "

"Wha?" went Hater as he looked up at the molten menace; tears still streaming from his eyes.

" _ **All of you. Awesome, Mandrake, Sourdough, McGuffin. You're all so fixated with who's on first, what's on second, I-don't-know's on third. And it's all so totally lame!**_ " Dominator continued; his tone indicating that this had been a long time coming. " _ **I mean seriously, is that all villainy is to you people? One giant pissing contest? Do you think**_ **I** _ **go around destroying planets just so people will think I'm cool? Well, I don't!**_ "

"Then… why do you do it?" asked Hater; suddenly sounding slightly less sad.

" _ **Because it's fun.**_ " Dominator answered bluntly. " _ **And really, what other reason does anyone need to do anything?**_ "

"B-But that makes no sense!" said Peepers, speaking up in spite of his overwhelming fear. "Destroying planets you could be ruling; that just seems so… pointless!"

" _ **Maybe it is pointless. Or maybe it's all a part of some twisted grand design.**_ " The molten madman replied casually. " _ **All I know is that there's over a zillion little points of light out there, and the universe won't care if a few hundred thousand of them suddenly go out.**_ "

"Wow… that's… really bleak."

" _ **Well, you'll forgive me if I don't have the most cheerful outlook on life, but I am a supervillain after all.**_ "

"Fair enough." Peepers replied, sounding more than slightly suspicious.

Something just wasn't adding up about this situation. Based on what little Peepers knew about him, Lord Dominator wasn't the type for casual conversation. And yet here he was, shooting the breeze with them like it was the most normal thing in the universe. Oh yes, something was most definitely off about this.

Could he be stalling for something? And if so, stalling for what? This had to be some kind of trap, but for the life of him, Peepers couldn't figure out what he was planning.

'Oh well,' the Grand Watchdog thought to himself. 'As it is written in the sacred texts of the Szlarnian Homeword, 'The best way to avoid a trap is to spring it'.'

"Say, Dominator." Peepers began casually; albeit with a certain degree of caution. "Pardon me for saying so, but uh… you don't seem quite like yourself."

" _ **Nothing gets past you, eh Eagle Eye.**_ " Dominator said teasingly.

"Nope." Peepers __replied; unfazed by the taunt. "In fact, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were a completely different person altogether."

" _ **Perceptive little twerp, aren't you?"**_ The molten madman said; only this time his tone was slightly less antagonistic. " _ **Well, you're not wrong. So much has happened. And in many ways I'm not the same person I was when I first found you little vermin hiding aboard my ship.**_ "

"What do you mean?" asked the Grand Watchdog; ignoring the insults.

" _ **It's… complicated.**_ " Dominator answered; pausing for just a second as he appeared to ponder over something. " _ **Tell me squirt, have you ever had a bad day?**_ "

"Uh… what?"

" _ **They say that all it takes is one bad day to turn a normal person into a monster.**_ " The molten menace began; his tone now strange and unreadable. " _ **But they're wrong. Sometimes it takes a thousand bad days. One right after the other in almost rhythmic succession. Each one chipping away a little of your psyche. Until one day, your mind finally shatters into a billion tiny pieces.**_ "

"Yeah… I've been there." Lord Hater said suddenly; no longer balling like a little baby.

Peepers suspected that his master was referring to his numerous encounters with a certain wandering weirdo, but he also suspected that Dominator was talking about something else entirely.

" _ **Yeah… and after that there's only two things you can do.**_ " The molten menace said; sounding almost… sad. " _ **You can either just lay there, and stay a pathetic, blubbering pile of mush for the rest of your life. Or you can try to put yourself back together. But even then, there's no guarantee that you'll ever be the same person you were before. More often than not, once all the pieces are back in place, you'll be someone, or something, completely new.**_ "

"True… so very true." The dark lord commented; though it was clear that the two villains were having two completely different conversations.

Still, Peepers found this all rather interesting. While it was now more obvious than ever that the molten menace was trying to stall for something, the opportunity to learn more about this mysterious new foe was far too enticing to pass up. So in spite of the possible danger, the Grand Watchdog allowed him to continue.

" _ **But… no matter how much you lose yourself in your new persona, the traces of your old self never fully go away. And sooner or later, when you least expect it, the old memories come along and punch you right in the gut.**_ " Dominator went on; sounding almost like he was in a trance. " _ **The painful hot flashes. The unwanted party crashers screaming through your synapses. Merciless, Unrelenting… You… You can't even escape into madness.**_ "

'This is getting more and more interesting by the minute.' Peepers thought to himself as he started to form a rough mental sketch of his foe's twisted psyche. 'Just keep talking, crazy. You're giving me all kinds of juicy intel.'

" _ **And then one day… you meet someone… someone who changes your whole outlook on… well, everything.**_ " Dominator continued, now sounding almost… happy. " _ **Isn't it funny how just one little random encounter can cleave off the old pieces of your past, and set your soul ablaze. Giving you a new zest, a new craving for life, that you didn't even know was possible.**_ "

"So… you've met someone?" the Grand Watchdog asked, already suspecting the answer. "Someone special? Is that why you're acting so different?"

" _ **Well… that's a bit of an oversimplification.**_ " The molten menace replied. " _ **After all, this is something I've been waiting for almost my entire life.**_ "

"Really? Is that so?"

" _ **Of course! I mean; I'm sure I don't need to tell you what a cruel and wretched place the universe is. But do you have any idea what's it's like to wade through all that muck and gore all by yourself?**_ "

"Can't say that I do."

" _ **Didn't think you would. But it doesn't matter. None of it matters now. All of the battles, the bad days, the brutalities. They're all just white noise in my brain. Because now I have the one thing, the one and only thing someone like me needs.**_ "

"Oh really, and… what is that?"

" _ **Isn't it obvious?**_ " Dominator replied; chuckling a little before he continued. " _ **I have the only thing a villain really needs. Not power. Not planets. Not even an indestructible army. Just one person; one person who sees me for the monster I know I am, but loves me anyway.**_ "

A sudden silence fell over the area. As no one present knew quite how to respond to what had been said.

Fortunately, Lord Hater managed to break this silence before things got too awkward.

"Wow…" the cloaked skeleton spoke up suddenly. "I… weirdly feel a whole lot better."

" _ **Do you now?**_ "

"Yeah… I mean; I don't know why, but after listening to you just now, I feel better than I have in months."

" _ **Glad to hear it.**_ " Replied Dominator; before his voice took on a much, much darker edge. " _ **Because that means what happens next will be all the more painful for you.**_ "

End Notes:

Well…. That's the end of this one folks. Sorry if it wasn't as exciting as you'd hoped. The next one will be a lot more interesting; I promise. Until then, Peace.


	7. Chapter 6

Hello everybody, and welcome to the latest chapter of 'The Revenge'. This one's a little shorter than the others, but I think you'll like it nonetheless. Just a quick heads-up, after this one there's only two chapters left and after that I'll be going on break again. But until then, 'Wander over Yonder' is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 6.

Time: 12:44 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Skrillpon 5.

As a gentle breeze wafted across the barren plains, Commander Peepers felt his heart drop into his stomach.

"Um… Mind running that by us again?" the Grand Watchdog asked; his tone betraying his mortal terror.

" ** _Oh, I'm sorry. Was I not clear before?_** " Dominator replied mockingly. " ** _Please, allow me to explain. In about… ninety seconds or so, you and your boneheaded boss are going to be thrown headfirst into a world of unimaginable agony. There. Is that clear enough for you?_** "

"B-B-But you said you were gonna let us go." Said Peepers, as his terror became even more pronounced. "You said hurting us would be a waste of your time. Remember?"

" ** _If you'll recall, I never actually said I was gonna let you two go. You jumped to that conclusion all on your own, Peepsy._** " The molten madman answered in a tone both playful and menacing. " ** _Also, I only said killing you would be a waste of my time. But I don't need to kill you to make you suffer._** "

"Do your worst, Lava-Butt!" Lord Hater said suddenly; his voice dripping with ill-timed bravado. "I'm not afraid of you. I'm the master of torture in this galaxy. There's nothing you can do to me that I haven't already done to someone else, only ten times worse!"

" ** _Well, you say that…_** " Dominator began, only to be cut off by an all too familiar voice.

"Hey Deedee~" said the aforementioned voice from across the way. "Guess who~"

All at once, everyone turned their gaze toward the far end of the crater, and there, as if by magic, stood the bane of their entire operation.

Wander.

But before anyone else could even try to react, Dominator let out a loud, almost girlish squeal; which sounded most unusual with his deep masculine voice.

" ** _Pumpkin!_** " the molten madman shouted jubilantly, before rushing over to give the furry nomad a great, big, bone crushing hug. " ** _Oh~ I missed you soooooooooooooo much!_** "

"Really?" Wander asked playfully. "We just talked on the phone last night."

" ** _Talk is cheap. I need to be near my fuzzy wuzzy widdle peachy pie, so I can give him lots and lots of huggles~_** " Dominator answered, in a disgustingly affectionate way.

"Oh~ You big ol' softie. Come 'ere you." Wander replied, sounding equally affectionate, as he gave the hulking lunatic a smaller, slightly less bone crushing hug and started nuzzling his cheek into his chest.

All the while, everyone else in the vicinity was looking on at this bizarre scene with wide, unblinking eyes.

"Oh… My… Grop…." Said Hater, sounding as though he'd just witnesses a train wreck.

"I know, Sir." Replied Peepers, sounding equally aghast. "I can't believe it either."

"I owe Dave in Accounting sooooooooooooooooooooo much money right now."

"What?"

Unfortunately, before Peepers could get a proper explanation, the two 'lovebirds' interrupted.

"Say, why don't you take off all that armor so I can get a better look at my best gal." Wander suggested; much to the confusion of everyone in attendance.

" ** _Oh, silly me~ I forgot I was wearing it. Just a second, Sweetie._** "

Then, to the absolute astonishment of everyone in the area, the molten menace suddenly shrunk down to roughly half his size; revealing 'himself' to be a rather attractive looking young woman with lime-green skin and rosy-pink eyes.

"Better?" the now female Dominator asked seductively.

"Much." Replied Wander as he gave her yet another loving embrace; this time while laying his fuzzy cheek against her amble bosom.

Now everyone was staring for entirely different reasons.

"Oh… My… **_GROP!_** " Lord Hater exclaimed; his voice dripping with rage and revulsion.

"I know, Sir." Replied Peepers, sounding equally repulsed. "I can't believe…"

But before the Grand Watchdog could finish that remark, his master rushed over to confront the two canoodlers.

" _YOU!_ " the cloaked skeleton roared as he pointed an accusatory finger at what a few minutes ago had been the terror of the galaxy. "You're a woman!"

"And you must be Captain Obvious." Replied the female Dominator teasingly.

"Lord Hater!" the furry nomad said suddenly; practically bursting with excitement. "Oh my gosh, I didn't even see you over there. How've you been, Buddy?"

"We're not… Ugh! Never mind that now! Why are you a woman?"

"I don't know. Just born that way I guess."

"Oh, that's right, you two haven't formally met yet have you." Wander said, seemingly oblivious to the aura of confusion that radiated throughout the area. "Well, I'll just fix that right now. Deedee, this here's my pal Lord Hater. Lord Hater, this here's my girlfriend Deedee. There, now we can all be friends."

"I'm not your… Girlfriend? How the… Who… Wha… Wait, Deedee?"

"Yeah, it's short for Deandra." Dominator said matter-of-factly. "What? Did you think my parents named me Dominator? I'm pretty sure that counts as child abuse."

"So Hater," the hairy nomad cut in; sounding as disgustingly good-natured as ever. "What brings you to this neck of the galaxy anyway?"

"I… I don't even know anymore."

"I invited him." The lime-skinned woman said cheerfully. "It was a surprise for you, Sweetums. Do you like it?"

"Like it? I _love_ it~" Wander replied exuberantly as he pulled both Lords into one of his patented back-cracking group hugs. "Wow~ A picnic with my two favorite people in the whole universe~ What more could anyone want?"

" _Picnic?_ " went Hater, sounding more than a little terrified.

"Oh, that reminds me. I gotta go setup the blanket. Be back in a sec."

And with that, the orange nomad zipped off to parts unknown.

"Take your time, Muffin~" Dominator purred sweetly to her beloved before turning her attention back on Hater. "What the heck are you starring at?"

"You're a woman."

"Yes, we've already established that."

"But… you're called _Lord_ Dominator."

"Only because _Lady_ Dominator sounds like the owner of a bondage club."

"So, wait… you…you never really wanted to duel me did you?"

"Nope."

"So all of this… the email, that monologue… it was all just so you could trick me into going on a picnic… with _Wander_?"

"Pretty much."

"But why? Why would you do this to me?"

"Because I'm evil, and I like watching people suffer." She answered bluntly. "And… that's literally all there is to it."

"Oh… My… Grop…" the dark lord moaned dejectedly; looking as though he was about to collapse in defeat.

Peepers readied himself to walk over and console his soon-to-be wailing master, but before he could even take a step, the cloaked skeleton suddenly perked up.

"Wait a minute, I have a ship. I can just leave!" he reasoned; before shifting into childish taunt mode. "HA! In your face, Dumb-inator! Didn't think of that, did you!"

"Actually I did." She replied; sounding unfazed by the jab. "Which is why, while you and your so-called soldiers were scrambling around in the dust, I took that fruity little car of yours and… well, just look over that way."

Hater turned his gaze to where Dominator was pointing and immediately his eyes went wide with shock. Feeling curious, Peepers did the same and was met with a most alarming sight.

There, less than fifty yards due south of the crater, was an enormous and clearly unnatural glacier; which appeared to contain a rather large object that was roughly shaped like a humanoid skull.

'Oh…' thought the Grand Watchdog as he suddenly felt foolish for not noticing it sooner. 'So that's what happened to the Frostonium Ray.'

"Yeah, I'm no expert or anything," Dominator said, bringing Peepers' focus back on the two villains. "But I'd say it will take you at least… three hours to thaw that out with your lightning; barring any unforeseen _adorable_ distractions."

"Well… I… I…" Lord Hater stammered as he feebly tried to come up with a response. "I'll… I'll run away. Yeah! I'll run clear to the other side of the planet if I have to!"

"Go ahead." The villainess shot back casually. "I'll just tell Wander you're playing hide and seek. Then he'll be all over you like buzzards on a gut wagon."

"Then I'll just… I'll just… just…"

"Face it, Hatey. You're screwed no matter what you do." Dominator said tauntingly. "So do yourself a favor and try taking it like a man for once."

Unfortunately, before Hater could even attempt to come up with a clever retort, their conversation was suddenly derailed by an all too familiar cry.

" _Picnic Time~_ "

Then, almost like clockwork, every watchdog in the area, save for one, rushed over to partake of the hairy wanderer's sumptuous banquet.

"Be right there, Pumpkin~" the villainess called cutely to her beloved, before shifting her focus back on Hater. "So, are you gonna come willingly, or do I have to drag you there like a gimp?"

"I… I'll… be there in a minute." The dark lord answered, sounding so hollow and defeated.

"Okay, but don't take too long, or else." She threatened as she began to turn around; only to pause midway. "Oh, and just a quick heads-up, Wander and I are at that stage in our relationship where both of us are super into pet names and kissing in public, so… be prepared for the worst."

And with that, she left the lesser villain to his own devices; which in this case meant letting him fall to his knees and moan miserably.

It was at this time that, as per his nature, Peepers walked up to his disheartened master and once again gave him the traditional there-there pat on the back.

"There-there, Sir." He said gently. "It's gonna be okay."

"No it's not." Hater replied. "It's gonna be a nightmare."

"Oh, come now, Sir. Things could be worse."

"How, Peepers? How could this day possibly get any worse?"

"So Doodlebug, what do you want on your sandwich? Mustard or Mayo?"

"Gee, I'm not sure, Shnookums. What are my choices again?"

"Well, there's Mustard, and then there's Mayo."

"Wow, such a tough decision. Would you mind going over the choices a few more times?"

"Sure thing. Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~ Mustard or Mayo~"

" ** _NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_** "

End Notes:

A wise man once said, 'There's all kinds of pain'. I have no idea who said that, but it's certainly true in this instance. Anyway, I hope you liked it. Only two chapters left. Please leave a fav, follow, or review before you leave. Peace.

P.S.

For those of you feeling sorry for Lord Hater right now. Rest assured that I will make it up to him in a later story.

I won't say how exactly. But let's just say I've become quite fond of one of the newer shippings.


	8. Chapter 7

Hello, and welcome to yet another exciting chapter of The Revenge. Don't have a lot to say this time around, so let's just get right to it. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Chapter 7.

Time: 20:21 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Lord Hater's Skullship.

It had been a long and, for lack of a better word, agonizing day, but after several hours of torture, followed by several more hours of melting ice, Lord Hater and his 'indomitable' Watchdog Army were finally able to leave Skrillpon 5.

Although as soon as they were clear of the system, the dark lord sequestered himself within his private Torture Room and announced to everyone onboard that he was not to be disturbed.

That was about… four hours ago.

"So the guy looks like something you'd win at a church carnival, and yet he's smooching it up with _that_ saucy number." Said Chuck the Watchdog to his best pal Steve as they walked down one of the ship's many corridors. "It's official, Wander is my _hero_."

"Whatever man, just don't let Hater hear you say that." Said Steve with an odd blend of casual caution. "After a day like today, he'll be looking for an excuse to crucify somebody."

"Oh, you worry too much." Replied Chuck. "Trust me, I've worked for Hater a lot longer than you have, and I've learned to recognize the patterns. He'll either spend the next few days sulking or he'll find something stupid to obsess over so he won't have to think about his real problems. Either way, both he and C-Peeps are gonna be way too busy to notice what Ol' Chuck is up to."

"Are you sure?"

"Sure I'm sure. Ever since Wander showed up, the management in this place has gone straight down the tubes. I never read memos. I never show up for staff meetings. Heck, I don't even show up for my shifts if I don't feel like it. And nobody ever notices." The senior Watchdog boasted shamelessly. "I tell ya, the last year and a half has been like one long paid vacation. And baby, it's just getting started."

"I think you should quit while you're ahead, man." Replied Steve. "Sooner or later someone's gonna catch you, and then you'll be in _real_ trouble."

"Oh, will you relax. Hater's never gonna find out." Chuck said with no small amount of swagger. "As long as Wander and Dominator are around, I'm just Mr. Invisible."

XXX

( _Fifteen Minutes Later_ )

"Then again… I could be wrong." Said Chuck the Watchdog, in what was quite possibly the biggest understatement of the century.

After spending the better part of a year as the Watchdog Army's most successful goldbricker, Private Charles Hampton 'Chuck' the Watchdog had finally been cornered by his supreme lord and master.

However, it had not been any of his previous offenses that led him to be chained to a giant iron cross in the dark lord's Torture Room. On the contrary, it had been the simple act of accidentally leaning against the door of said Torture Room after the cloaked skeleton had left explicit instructions not to be disturbed.

So to put it plainly, 'Mr. Invisible' was in some serious hot water.

"Peepers, have you seen my hacksaw?" Lord Hater asked his faithful #2 as he pawed through his collection of pain inducing instruments. "I feel like killing Chuck with my hacksaw."

"No, Sir. I haven't." Peepers answered, while stuffing 'something' into his back pocket. "But before you take out your frustration on a member of our ever dwindling staff, can I just say that I think you're making a mountain out of a molehill on this one. I mean, when you think about it, today wasn't all that bad."

"Are you kidding me? Today was awful!" the dark lord shot back. "No, it was worse than awful! I'd have to win the lottery and find Wander's head on a pike just so I could upgrade this day to awful!"

"Sir, you're exaggerating again."

"I had to watch _Wander_ make out with a _hot girl_!"

"Okay… I'll admit that's pretty bad. But look on the bright side."

" _What_ bright side?"

"Well… at least this time your humiliation was private." The Grand Watchdog replied; his tone suggesting that he was grasping at straws. "And… and no one was seriously hurt. And you're still ranked fourth in the entire galaxy. Doesn't that make you feel better?"

"You know what, it actually does." Lord Hater admitted as his tone suddenly became much more relaxed. "Thank you, Peepers."

"Y-Y-You're welcome, Sir." The Grand Watchdog replied, clearly thrown/enamored by this uncharacteristic display of appreciation. "Glad I could help."

"Yeah, and you know what else, Dominator was right. I do care too much about what other people think." He continued. "Being a villain isn't about getting high marks or making people think I'm cool."

"Quite right, Sir. It's about…"

"It's about destroying the things you hate!"

"Uh… what?"

"And right now, there's nothing in the entire universe that I hate more than that skeevy witch Dominator!"

"Sir, you're getting that crazed look in your eyes again. Maybe you should…"

"Dominator! **Dominator!** **_DOMINATOR!_** I'll curse that name 'til the day I die!"

"And… he's off, ladies and gentlemen." Peepers said dryly, as he slumped forward and accepted his fate.

"And I will not rest, until I have wreaked my unholy vengeance upon her!"

"This is gonna be a whole thing with you, isn't it?"

" ** _REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGE!_** "

"I thought so."

"So… Does this mean I'm off the hook?"

End Notes:

Huh… I thought this chapter would be a lot longer. Oh well, I guess it's not the length that counts, but the content. Anyway, only one chapter left; The Epilogue. And then I'm on break again. Hope you've all been enjoying yourselves and I'll see you later. Peace.


	9. Epilogue

Here it is folks, as promised, the epilogue. Wander over Yonder is owned by Disney. Enjoy.

The Revenge: Epilogue.

Time: 09:25 GST (Galactic Standard Time)

Location: Unknown.

For what felt like an eternity, the Doctor stared into his own reflection. Although in his humble opinion, the man starring back at him was not someone he recognized.

"My god… what happened to you?" said the metal-man to his other self. "You used to be somebody. You used to be the terror of two galaxies. You used to bark orders at a legion of mercenaries and slaughter-bots. But now look at you. You're nothing. Nothing but a glorified errand boy."

For another minute or so, the Doctor just stood there in silence, but when it became clear that his reflection wasn't going to reply he spoke up again.

"Oh well, it'll all be worth it once I'm running this galaxy. Then they'll see. They'll _all_ see!"

Ordinarily, such a rant would have gone on for several more minutes, but the sudden realization that he was holding something reminded him that at the moment he had other responsibilities.

 _Knock!_

 _Knock!_

 _Knock!_

"Who is it~" said the Night Mayor teasingly from somewhere behind the door.

"It's the Filler Brush Man. Who the hell do you think it is?"

"Language, Doctor. Language."

"Just open the door!"

"Alright, alright, I'll let ya in. You ol' sourpuss."

 _Beeeep!_

A few seconds later, the metal door slid open, and the Doctor entered his _partner's_ office.

"You know; I'm getting _really_ sick of that No Swearing Rule of yours." The robot-man grumbled as he walked towards the dandy bat's desk. "Just because you used to be a priest doesn't mean you can…"

"Deacon."

"What?"

"I was a _Deacon_ , Doctor. Not a Priest. There's a difference."

"Whatever! Here's your stupid paper."

And with that said, the metal-man slammed the morning newspaper against the man-bat's desk and prepared to storm out of the room.

However, before he could even take one step towards the door, the Night Mayor used his unnatural speed to get right in front of him.

"Somethin' wrong, Doctor?" he asked, sounding almost genuinely concerned. "You seem a might upset."

"Upset? Why the hell would I be upset?" the scarred automaton asked sarcastically. "Just because I came _this_ close to ruling the entire universe, only to have my plans thwarted by the efforts of lesser minds. Just because I spent the better half of three years drifting through space like a bum! Just because I ended up in this pathetic little Podunk Galaxy, a trillion miles from nowhere, playing lackey to Churchy La Rube! No, I'm not upset at **_ALL_**!"

"Glad to hear it." The dandy bat said jovially; seemingly unfazed by his partner's outburst. "But just the same, I'd like to give you somethin'. Sort of a token of my appreciation for all your hard work."

And with that, the vampiric politician reached into his left pocket and began to fish around.

'Oh, this should be good.' The metal-man thought sarcastically as he rolled his glowing red eyes.

"Ah! Here it is!" the Night Mayor said ecstatically as he pulled out the tiny trinket and held it up for his partner to see.

Immediately, the automaton's eyes went wide with amazement.

There, sitting right in the center of the man-bat's steady palm, was a tiny statue of the Doctor; carved from what appeared to be solid ivory.

"Oh my god…" he said with quite awe.

"I knew you'd like it."

"You… You made this?"

"But of course. Carved it myself just last night." The dandy bat replied warmly. "Go on. Take it."

Needing no further prompting, the Doctor quickly seized the tiny figurine of himself and began examining it gingerly. The detail. The craftsmanship. Everything about it was just so… so…

"Magnificent." The metal-man muttered before turning his attention back on the man-bat. "I… I don't know what to say."

"No need to say anythin'." The Night Mayor replied kindly. "Just keep it with you always and remember it as a token of my appreciation… and a warnin'."

"A… warning?" the Doctor repeated confusedly. "Warning about what?"

This time the dandy bat did not answer right away. Instead, he just closed his eyes and took a long deep breath; clearly needing a moment to choose his next words carefully.

"I'm a changed man, Doctor." He said finally, after what felt like an eternity. "The decades of shadows and secrecy have tempered my rage. And in many ways, I'm not the man I was when I first crawled out of Zolomon's accursed inferno. But I ain't no fool."

For reasons he could not even begin to understand, the metal-man suddenly felt very, very afraid.

"I never go into business with someone without first learnin' a thing or two about 'em. And Doctor, I've learned plenty about you." The Night Mayor said, his tone now deathly serious. "I know about your past. I know about your bigotry against organic lifeforms, such as myself. And most importantly, I know about your penchant for betrayal. So whatever half-baked scheme you've got cooked up to backstab me, I suggest you forget it. Otherwise, you're gonna end up in worse shape than the gentleman who _donated_ that chunk of ivory. Savvy?"

Still much too scared and confused to give a proper reply, the good Doctor just nodded his head slowly.

"Good." The dandy bat said, before disappearing and then reappearing in the chair behind his desk. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'd like to check on the weather."

And with that said, the Night Mayor picked up his newspaper and opened it to the desired section.

All the while, the scarred automaton just stood there in frightened confusion.

'What the hell was that all about?' he asked himself. 'And what did he mean? Where did this ivory come from?'

All of these questions, plus a thousand more, were answered once he caught a glimpse of the newspaper's headline.

And those answers filled his clockwork heart with a greater, much more primal sort of fear.

"The wind blows hardest just before you reach the mountaintop." The Night Mayor said casually, not even bothering to look up from his paper. "Just keep that in mind, and you might make it out of this in one piece."

Once again, the Doctor gave no reply.

He was much too fixated on the headline to say anything.

Those words.

Those three little boldfaced words.

Separately they were meaningless.

But together, they spelled out a message that made his internal fluids run cold.

They read as follows.

 **King Drakor Murdered.**

End Notes:

Coming in July: The Pillow Talk.

Stay Tuned.


End file.
